Contest 110! (Blog 607)
It’s time for another Matt-starring, teacher-themed, podcast-promoting blog! It features another regular whose name I can’t remember, but ‘Zo’ is springing to mind. Hello, Zo. If that’s not your name though, God knows where I got it from as I’ve never heard that name before in my life. It’s like me meeting an old friend and saying ‘’Hey, I remember you! You’re, you’re… you’re not Alan, you must be… Spog??’ This time there is an additional teacher with 15 years of experience and I’m sure she’ll be very insightful. Also, I’m sure her name is 100% normal, now let’s go! Surprise, surprise, Matt quickly points out that navy SEALs would refuse to teach middle schoolers and that the former would find their treatment to be inhumane. That may sound amusing, but what he’s implying is that there could be some kind of battle between the SEALs and children. Needless to say, that must not happen. Not just because it would be extremely one-sided but because if the children had problems with authority before? Well, imagine things after the battle. Speaking of navy SEALs, did you know the acronym means ‘sea, air and land’? Fair enough, I’ve seen seals (the animals) in the sea and on land but NOT flying, so the acronym could be better. I still like it, though. It’s almost very clever. Although if I was sent to battle and wanted the enemy to fear me, I probably wouldn’t call myself a ‘seal’ as little girls find them to be adorable.
On no, now the female teacher is talking about how she stopped teaching and found another job, that being behavioural therapy. Matt asks if she likes that better than teaching and the woman says she does. Yeah, she didn’t meet people like me. She says each person she deals with has their own character which is ‘interesting’ but then again, I find people who cut their own legs off with electric saws to be interesting. Would I want to be around them? Probably not but at the same time I would be sympathetic. As in ‘You think your legs are against you? That’s tough’. At the same time though, it really is for the best I point out the person is a weirdo, just so he gets an idea of other people’s reactions. ‘Oh wow, cool!’ would be very rare. Matt points out that parents get defensive when their children get criticised as they think it’s an attack on them. Matt would say things like ‘Your child spits milk all over the floor’ and a parent would respond by saying ‘Well, he doesn’t get that from me’. What parent spits milk all over the floor??? The woman teacher later says ‘the fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree’ and Matt corrects her by saying ‘the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree’ which amused me as other people’s mistakes annoy me. It’s not me being an asshole or anything, it’s just that other people’s errors make me worry they’re not errors after all and that I have to forget what I already know and learn something new. Stop it!
The woman teacher later said ‘yeah, no, yeah.’ I was thinking ‘… this is exactly the kind of person who makes me doubt what I’ve previously learnt and what I’m learning at the moment…’ What do you mean?? It would be particularly bad if she was an English teacher and I was in her class. I’m confused about what ‘yes’ and ‘no’ means? God help me. Maybe the real reason she changed jobs is because someone as confused as me complained about her. I’m not saying it’s right but in my world, it makes sense. Oh, I’m so sorry, the subtitles said the teacher said ‘Yeah, I know, yeah.’ Still a bit causal for an educational setting but again, it does make sense. Thank God the same teacher was never a navy SEAL. Another soldier would be like ‘Should we shoot these people, or are they just hostages??’ Then the teacher says ‘Yeah, no, yeah’. You HAVE to be clearer… Fortunately the schools I’ve been to at least weren’t so high-risk and intense, so it’s not a true criticism of the teacher. Interestingly, the teacher I called ‘Zo’, later said ‘no’ I think 14 times in about 10 seconds; ‘yeah’ 7 times in about 3 seconds; and ‘okay’ three times in about two seconds. THAT’S someone who is clear. I would say it was overkill but I’ll leave it, as I’ve just mentioned the military and battles. ‘Overkill’ is a warlike word. Also, I’m 100% sure Zo (a name I’m not sure of) doesn’t fight in wars and if he does, he doesn’t get confused and shoot hostages.
Yes! At 34:37, it is confirmed the teacher I referred to as ‘Zo’ is indeed called Zo! Thank God! I thought I was going insane! Speaking of going insane, the subtitles at 37:13 suggest that Matt said ‘but he didn’t shoot any of them’ whilst Matt talks about class clowns! That’s the subtitles going insane! He did not lightheartedly bring up the subject of children shooting people (although that would be nice and consistent with the navy SEAL theme), but in the defence of the subs, I don’t know exactly what Matt was saying either. I know what he’s not saying, though. A student annoyed with not being able to shoot people whilst acting as ‘the class clown’ doesn’t make sense in any kind of way whatsoever. Maybe you’d like to watch the video at that point and try to work out what he was saying. I’m stumped! I later thought the captions went weird again when they said ‘yerba mates’. What are they? Yerba friends? What are yerbas?? Actually, having Googled yerba mates, I found they’re a type of plant often put in tea! Ahhhh… Still though, class clowns don’t shoot people. Ah, I found out that the woman teacher is called ‘Bonnie’ at the end! Usually people say what their names are at the START of videos, not the end but hell, maybe I just wasn’t listening properly which is more than plausible! Now check out the video below!
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