Staines Part Infinity Minus 1 (Blog 606)

It’s a Sunday morning and I’m about to head to Staines! Before that though, here’s a mini story: Annoyingly, I lost 2 vitamin D tablets a while ago. If I didn’t, I would have run out of them on this exact same day, which would be amazing as I’ll be buying more in the town, later! Not to worry though, I skipped taking tablets for a couple of days and I think I’m fine. But if I break one of my bones after colliding with something at 2mph? You’ll know why. As I’ll have the empty Vitamin D bottle in my pocket to compare to other bottles in Boots and to make sure I pick up the right one, that means I won’t hear the tablets rattling around with every step. I’ve done that before and it was annoying, not just for me but for everybody. This was perhaps equally annoying: When the clocks changed, giving me an extra hour in bed, I missed the time on my computer clock going backwards for the first time in one year. (I don’t mean to imply I saw that happen a year ago, because I didn’t. :( What I meant was the clocks went back one year ago and that’s it). I wasn’t excited enough to stay awake clearly, but it would have been nice. And it wouldn’t just be good for me, actually. Think how excited someone as great as Einstein would get if someone told him time could go backwards. Now what to call this blog? ‘Staines Part Infinity Minus One’ sounds reasonable enough to me, but A.I. is suggesting ‘Vitamin D Tablet Incident’ which sounds silly. Good call!

I’m back! First up, on my travels to the town, I saw a diverted traffic sign. Oh no, my arch nemesis. Not to worry, the road I wanted wasn’t diverted! It certainly looked that way though, I guess the problem is there are just too many roads for my poor brain to handle. I also got scared when I saw another sign, but turns out only the footpath was closed. Phew! False alarm, I was driving and it felt good. As buying vitamin D supplements is boring obviously (although my bones will enjoy them very much) I bought them first, whilst saving the better purchases for later as always. Well, you’d think it would be boring, the label of the same product has been changed from a dull grey to a fun and vibrant orange, a colour that I read brings up feelings of cheerfulness and passion. Again, they’re just supplements but my bones can’t get enough of them. Well, actually they can! Overdose on the vitamins and you could end up with overly sized bones or something like that, I think, anyway. If I could somehow give my bones a message, it would be this: I do appreciate you, of course I do. However, until the day comes where I take up street fighting, I’m simply not going to need bones twice my normal size. Between you and me, there are some annoying people at the gym, so hang in there.

You know when I said I would be bringing an empty bottle of vitamins with me to compare with others? How do you think it looked when I put the empty product back in my pocket without paying for it, just as I was about to leave the shop? I’ll tell you how I looked, I looked shifty and there was simply nothing I could do. I felt so helpless but at least no one complained. At least I hope they didn’t. The main thing was I bought the right strength of vits. Again, I don’t need to try a dangerous form of bodybuilding QUITE yet. As I wore another pair of shoes out from excessive gym use recently, I decided to buy some more for future use. Immediately after leaving Boots, I saw a shop called Sketchers but they had too many shoes if anything. A shoe paradise. I’m not sure if I need shoes that are quite so impressive, again I just want them for the gym. Not to worry, JD Sports had just the right amount of trainers on offer and for a nice cheap price. Last time I went there I was struggling to accept the fact I was a midget and bought a pair of shoes that were a little bit too big for me (size 9), just so I could feel like a big man. I’ve finally pulled myself together and bought some fitting shoes. Size 8.5 would be just right, no? Nope, I bought size 8 but I did the right thing in doing so. Slightly hard to accept but whatever. The shoes I bought were white, meaning they’d get dirtier easier. It confused me when my brother said black cars show up dirt more, it still doesn’t make sense to me. In the shop, I also saw a super goth who looked scary, dressed all in black, but again, she didn’t need to worry about stains unless she’s a car, which she isn’t.

Next came the CD shopping! As I walked to HMV, I potentially had the problem of rattling Vitamins but I didn’t notice any sound, either because the hubbub of the town drowned everything out, because the vits were sound-proofed by my JD Sports bag (If so, an impressive bag), OR because I’m now deaf. If they did annoy the other shoppers, at least they were the right strength! Anyway, in the CD shop I faced my fears of rearranging my entire CD collection by alphabetising it again, and bought an album beginning with ‘L’. It’s about time I had some Lamb of God in my collection, right? I’ve heard great things about them. I’ve actually compared some of their songs with songs I’ve reviewed for Metal Rules, making it sound like I’ve been winging some of my reviews, not so, I have heard a FEW LoG songs, just not many. I could have bought a Slash LP which perhaps would make more sense because of the letter the artist begins with AND because he’s a great guitarist, but the S part of my music collection is now massive. I did of course check the LoG CD case wasn’t cracked. I recently complained about Amazon cracking a CD case I bought, but I get the feeling my dad did it. After that, came the best part of the trip and arguably the whole day: The milkshake and muffin! When I get my blood taken in the local Clozapine clinic every month, I also get weighed and I have a funny feeling my third month of losing weight in a row will be coming to an end, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. And that was the trip out, bye!