Contest 102! (Blog 568)

This month’s teachers themed podcast is called ‘Teachers EXPOSE the Real Reason Classrooms Are Failing.’ I actually think I know the reason. I mean surely it’s either a problem with the students, parents, or (and I know Matt and the two other podcasters will hate me saying this), the teachers. It’s not going to be because people aren’t eating enough carrots, is it? But let’s find out what they’ll say…  I hate to say this as well, but Matt soon asked another podcaster a fairly basic question and was told ‘I have no idea…’ No you know what? I didn’t know either! I was going to suggest it was the teacher’s fault after all for not knowing enough, but if it was and I didn’t know the answer, part of the problem would be me and I hate that idea. Another teacher complains how classes are often chaos. Again, not their fault and it’s not my fault either. In comparison, I could walk into a guitar shop and set the fire alarm off. Not my problem as that’s what you get for not hiring me many years ago, now. Yes, yes, yes, I didn’t know what I was talking about, but what can you say, really? You find a guitar you think looks cool and you play it. Again, it’s not my fault I didn’t get hired and it’s not my fault if I cause a huge panic in revenge. lol! Hang on… that sounded very bad. Also, I’m presuming the stars of the show wouldn’t like that comparison very much at all. Sorry.

Anyway, chaos in classrooms, fairly dramatic stuff. Very important to talk about, too. So why do these people quickly move onto the subject of cool trash cans that open up automatically? Imagine if the president said ‘Hello, viewers. This is a very important day. I’ve heard a huge bomb is going to go off somewhere and I don’t know where. But on a lighter note, you wouldn’t believe how cool the latest trash can is! It opens by itself!’ No you know what, I think that creates a much needed sense of calm in a terrifying situation. The teachers made the right move, again! I’d probably be offended if teachers were more concerned with bins than me, but no that’s what happened. This may also be offensive to children, but after the stories about bins, they talk about working out. One podcaster in particular says he loves working out and how big his muscles are. I work out A LOT, but my muscles have pretty much stayed the same. HOWEVER, I do often have a very low blood pressure, so much so a nurse was worried I was going to faint, (but not that worried as she let me go) which I interpreted as a win. No, no, I worked hard for that reading. Things aren’t always like that though, I do get higher results when the nurses try to take such a win away from me, I’m sure it’s not just in my imagination. They just act all nervous as well, in the hope I end up copying them, I know they do. They might as well shout ‘Boo!’ I just can’t prove it. That’s why people get angry with them, it’s a trap! ‘Oh you didn’t need therapy before? Now you do. And pay me’.

Oh God, apology 51 is coming up, isn’t it? Oh, I’ll deal with it later. Matt says he works out with all the schizophrenics like it’s a bad thing! People talking to themselves is fun! Especially if they have particularly out there delusions, I’ll tell you what’s not fun: Watching sane people jog! Who cares? Oh good, at around the 9 minute mark they talk about school again. It’s pretty standard stuff, really. Matt just says you can’t teach a class with too many students in it, and THAT’S why schools are failing. In a way, I’m wondering what else they have to say about bins. A teacher said that children who feel powerless in their lives have to take it out somehow, which could refer to poor behaviour OR bins. Ooh, Matt later has a different answer to what I was expecting, as to why classrooms are failing: Lawsuits! Not as crazy as carrots, but most people see the justice system as helpful. You wouldn’t complain of a burglary or whatever and then expect the police to try and make you fail at education or indeed anything! Especially as you fund the police with your taxes. I’d hate to pay for a man to make me fail! After that, ‘special Ed’ kids were discussed. Here’s what’s weird: Special Ed (or special Edward) would never be in ‘special ed’ (special education) as he’d be too talented and mentally healthy. People with special gifts (including special Ed/Edward) do not end up causing concern! (lol) Well I thought it was funny.

Matt compares putting children with mixed abilities in the same class with making boxers in different weight divisions fight each other. A valid point, other than people in schools aren’t made to compete with each other. Or at least I hope they’re not. As in ‘You’re top of the class and you can times 12345 by 54321 in your head in just one second. Now, would the child who can’t read like to try?’ That’s not cool… But other than that, a valid point. It just needs a bit of refinement, otherwise people like me will comment on it. Here’s something Matt said that was really wise though: When he was in school, a teacher asked why he kept staring out of the window and he said it was basically because he didn’t want to be there. I’m very much reminded of scientists who think the most beautiful explanation is the simplest. It’s like E-MC2, THAT’S simple. Well it looks simple. The teacher would be wondering, ‘there is something wrong here, but what?’ You’ll feel like an idiot if I told you the real reason. Matt also wisely says it’s never good to hit children, even though judging by what he says about many of them, that’s a challenge. Matt later complains that you’re not allowed to kick children out of class anymore, which is ironic as he clearly didn’t want to be in school, either. Kinda sounds like a reward to me, but it makes you think you’ve done something wrong, doesn’t it? It’s just that staring out the window and not doing anything is wrong, too. But again, I get Matt’s point!

Now check out the podcast below!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1gpmdMxxJGI