Contest 94! (Blog 530)

On this month’s teacher themed podcast, Matt and co. almost immediately discuss a place obsessed with cheese! Just a few seconds in and I’m depressed already, I’m reminded of me missing out on the Guildford chilli and cheese festival. I’m sad even though I don’t like cheese, once again it makes you wonder about the state of my mental health, doesn’t it? Fortunately the stars of the show don’t rub things in by talking TOO much about the food, but the ideal scenario would be them saying how much they hate it, and how much better it would be if they just stayed at home and did nothing other than pretend they were kings, like I did. Now that I think of it, that would be sad. Never mind. Matt later talks about cleaning spilt drinks up with his sock. I do that too! Although I’m starting to wonder what any of this stuff has to do with teaching in schools. I guess the problem is school is over for now. In a way I wish it wasn’t. Stop talking about cheese! You can talk about lazily clearing things up though, that’s not really triggering at all. I’m not sure how it would be. I guess I could have flashbacks over slipping over drinks, but my floors are carpet AND I wear socks. Not very slippery, is it? Double protection! :O

Ah, Matt eventually talks about universities and says how many of them are scams. Not true, where do you think I learnt how to write such great music? And to say ‘booo!’ with such passion? Lies, lies, lies, unis are great! If anything I’d prefer it if they talked about cheese rather than them rubbish my creativity. Another podcaster talks about how not all subjects taught in schools SEEM like they’re useful, for example algebra, but they do help you with problem solving in general. Fine, you win, I should be able to problem solve better. I put so much time and effort into making other people look silly, maybe I should put more effort into normal social interaction, instead, because that’s a problem too! (For me). You want me to say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’? When in a shop?? But it’s MY money. Granted shop workers say thank you to me as well, but if I were to say thank you after giving my money away to anyone else, word would spread. As in ‘that Simon likes it when he gives his money away, let’s have everything!’

A podcaster also pointed out how Yale provides no business degree. Please, I need to learn! Personally I find rudimentary business theory to be complicated. I mean… why say ‘thank you’ after giving my money away? It makes no sense… Annoyingly the podcasters keep saying that people should study subjects that have good job prospects. Ok, I get it, I can’t make money from saying ‘boo’ all the time, move on! My word! They also spend a long time discussing how expensive university is. I’m wondering how expensive Yale is, I’m assuming very. However, no students there would ever know as business isn’t taught there, which I guess is how the establishment make their money. THAT’S a scam. A sneaky trick. On second thoughts, you’d hope anyone studying at university would comprehend what the word ‘expensive’ means and that degrees and services in general cost money. You shouldn’t need to be taught that even in the most basic business lesson imaginable. Even if the subject was something completely unrelated to business, such as drama, you’d hope a student would understand simple language or how could he recite plays for example? Although, if I were to write a film, maybe it would be for the best if the actors didn’t know what they were saying. A film so silly, most likely about people exploding after eating expired food? (I have already written about that, after all). It’s too much.

Wow, these people are talking about tuition fees for ages. I guess it makes sense to talk more about that than cheese. But what am I going to write about, though? I’ll have to make something up, just for the sake of variety. Oh wow, Matt just turned into a cabbage. That was weird. Only joking. THAT’S the reason no one would want to star in any of my films, or indeed anything. Too whacky. Oh phew, they later talk about how boring the Covid lockdowns were. Wow, two whole years of staying at home and I remember little of what happened, other than me cycling a lot and watching Boris Johnson tell his viewers to keep staying home over and over and over again. That’s a time best forgotten. Oh yeah, I did. Oh no, the podcast is over and I don’t know what else to say. I guess to beef this blog up, I can do a summary of what I just watched. Right, there’s lots of cheese near Matt lives, more so than me even, Yale doesn’t teach business and university is expensive. That’ll do, now check his video below!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvuqKPr3hVY