Contest 97! (Blog 546)

Today’s Matt themed blog will be special as I didn’t get his permission for writing it. I KIND of did, he said I could use any of his stuff a while ago, just not recently. If Matt does complain, I can simply change his name to the completely different ‘Sebastien’ on a later date. In the worst case scenario, I could also say he’s not featuring in a teacher themed podcast, but a tutor themed radio show. Different enough. How do I explain the special thumbs up for Matt? Well, that’s Sebastien’s middle name. Sorted. Oh yes, and I’ll try not to mention mental illness again, but I’m not making any promises. Maybe a mental illness joke will get everything out of my system, that being ‘Why was the man with the same mindset as William mad? He was mentally Bill.’ Now let’s go! Matt (or ‘Matt’) immediately points out that if someone makes eye contact with you, have to say something to the person or it’s perceived as aggressive, especially in the gym. People do often stare at me in the gym, but let’s be real it’s usually out of fear, which is why I’m worried about getting ‘Sebastien’s’ permission for this blog. Matt also says that if you don’t look people in the eye, it sends a message that they can’t trust you. Well me looking at other people doesn’t help, so I disagree.

Another teacher who I’ll call ‘Joachim’ points out that children with iPads are so fixated on their computers they don’t make eye contact with you. Is that because iPads are super cool or because the children aren’t to be trusted? You could find out by taking the computers away from children and then seeing if they make eye contact with you, but apparently that’s impossible, the technology is just too good to leave alone. In a way I guess that sounds cool but come on, it is creepy. Ooh, Matt points out he’s 5 foot 6, just like me! As he isn’t ‘too big’ he points out how he doesn’t fight fair, just like… hang on, what? A bit of a strange thing to bring up in a teacher themed podcast or ‘radio show’ but I guess teachers are people just like you and me and some people out there (not children it’s worth pointing out) do need to be punched once or twice, or maybe bitten. He also asks if there’s something wrong with the shape of his head, but he does point out how there is something MENTALLY wrong at very least. Yes me too! I noticed how my glasses look slightly wonky on me so I assumed there was something wrong with my specs, but actually there isn’t meaning I have a slightly wonky face!

Matt points out how Santa is similar to teachers as Father Christmas gets constant maltreatment from children and sees lots of selfishness. It’s weird because if I ever met someone who was omnipresent and could travel the globe in minutes whilst delivering presents, I’d respect him. Joachim then says ‘big up to Santa’ and Matt says that he appreciates him, too. However, it is worth pointing out how Santa provides children with iPads - something seemingly all teachers hate - making the relationship with Santa complicated. Oh no Matt later says ‘you get so tired (with teaching) you get a little delusional and unreasonable.’ Mental illness is spreading, isn’t it? First it was me, now it’s Matt, soon it will be Joachim and the other teacher on the show who I’ll name ‘Peregrine’. Scary stuff. Matt says that Peregrine has ‘barely been here a decade’. Matt could mean teaching classes but it wasn’t clear, he could have meant a decade on this Earth, which would explain why he seems to believe in Santa. Well done for teaching, I guess! You’re clearly very mature, you certainly don’t look that young. If anything you look middle aged but I wouldn’t worry, it’s probably just a vibe rather than a medical condition. :)

Ohhhh Peregrine points out there are many rules in the English language that don’t make sense as it’s a mixture of lots of other languages. I never knew that, I always thought it was to be annoying! I should probably apologise to the teacher though. He IS wise, but does he like being called ‘Peregrine’? Probably not. Sorry, but I don’t know what else to call him as I don’t know his real name. I guess ‘sir’? On another matter, (I’m just randomly summarising a 45 minute video but at least I’m doing it in order) Matt says the reason people get therapy is because the complexity of the English language messes you up, which does make sense as I spend a lot of time writing and oh boy do I need my medication. Joachim (I should probably apologise for using that name, too) said as a teacher you should own the room. Wouldn’t that cause conflict with the other teachers? I hope not though, I’d love to own the whole building personally. And that’s all I have to say other than check their video out below! Bye!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0l63pQGXksI