Double Brain Checkup Madness! (Blog 517)

Yesterday I had a mental health checkup! Sounds pretty straight forward, right? Especially with my tendency to arrive to places around 30 minutes early. In fact, I arrived so early I asked the receptionist if I could come back, later. Why? So I could go charity shop CD browsing. Once upon a time there were three charity shops in the town, now it seems they’re all gone or at least have gone into hiding. But why would any charity shop do that? Maybe to increase the mystique such places have? As in, ‘Come to our charity shops… if you can find them, that is!’ All of a sudden such places aren’t known for their often tacky 2nd hand items but instead they become the stuff of legends, it’s how some extreme metal bands got popular. If so, their tactics did result in them not getting a pound or so from me. An interesting idea, though. Anyway, when I went back to my checkup, I was told there was a mistake on their part and I needed to go Staines. Ah Staines, home of the best milkshakes in at least a 5 mile radius. But then wasn’t the time for shakes, but for acting sensible and sane.

Because of all the confusion, I was about ten minutes late seeing the REAL doctor. I don’t know why I ran to the 2nd medical centre after leaving my car, my tardiness was their fault. However, at very least I must have came across as conscientious. On the other hand, maybe I didn’t as I had to wait around again to be seen. It’s more than likely my running wasn’t noticed in any way whatsoever. But at least I could come across as sensible, and I am sensible if I can change plans and drive somewhere different in just ten minutes or so, that’s amazing! And of course, no voices told me to go somewhere else, making me 100% sane. When I met the doc, she asked me the standard questions, such as ‘are you hearing any voices?’ etc. Nope! However, the other day I cut myself on some gym equipment, making it look life I self-harmed. A complete misunderstanding, but luckily it wasn’t noticed.

After ten minutes or so, the checkup was finished and I was told I could go. However, I got a little bit lost in the building and couldn’t get out. As in ‘yep, I’m all fine, bye… Sorry, where do I go? There are two doors to open and that’s confused me.’ Maybe my concentration wasn’t as good as I claimed just a few minutes earlier. Long story short after some trial and error, I was free once more. I’ll tell you what IS good, though: My OCD! I used to check if my car door was locked about fifty times, in the last few days I’ve been saying to myself ‘Door shut, definitely, door locked definitely’ and that’s that! Ok, I said that to myself three times in Staines, not just the one, but a huge improvement! Oh if only I was asked about that. I could have made conversation by saying ‘Oh and by the way, I only shut my car door three times today! Or four if you count the first place I went to!’ Then I’d have to explain I used to check over and over and over again, making me look mental.

Oh yes I’ve just remembered; making me look super reliable, sensible and an excellent person, I never complained when I was told to go to another town, even though I had to use a car park and presumably pay for a ticket in the first area. Little would the staff know, I actually screwed over the local gym again by using its carpark for free, by putting my gym pass under the window for inspectors to see. Nope, I wasn’t going to the gym at all heehee! I went to the gym later though, arguable putting things right, I just don’t want to pay for a ticket, that’s all. I did more honest parking in Staines. I didn’t need to pay for a ticket there, but I did make sure I didn’t park in a place that blocked someone’s driveway. I didn’t park in a disabled zone, either! Not quite as complicated as rocket science, but you DO have to be careful, much like rocket science. Not sure what else to say other than great brain! And… bye!