Pointless Doctor Checkup Extreme Part 2 Mental (Blog 565)

Right! As I’m typing on a Friday, I have ANOTHER pointless doctor’s checkup, this time in the afternoon. What do I do in the meantime? Point out how pointless it is. I mean I’ve had another checkup just two weeks ago and when I asked for my blood test results afterwards, I was told I was fine, proving it was indeed pointless hyper mega extreme. I always get asked to complete a survey on my experiences with the healthcare providers, and this time I’ll have to say everything DID go well and everyone was professional, (I’m presuming) it’s just my time had been wasted which is annoying. No wowed faces, this time. As the extreme checkup will be around the same time children get picked up from school, I’m wondering how much traffic there will be and when I should start the car journey. I go too early and I’ll be sitting in one of the world’s most depressing places for a long time, I leave too late, I miss the appointment, and I’ll have to go on ANOTHER day and have another pointless checkup! The difference being the atmosphere would be noticeably more tense.

Talking of leaving at unsure times, just before the last LCW meeting, I checked the website that gives information on all the trains in the country, and was told lots of the trains from my town into London were cancelled. However, that didn’t matter as other trains would be going there, or something like that. Well what the flip does that mean?? Well, it certainly confused me. In the end I thought it wasn’t worth stressing over so I just left for the station at the normal time. Well, a few minutes earlier as I wanted to get my glasses frame tightened up at the local opticians. I guessed that would take about 10 or 15 minutes to sort out, actually it was more like 2, so I had a lot of waiting around at the train station afterwards, right? Nope, I was bang on time as I caught a train leaving earlier than the one I usually get, that was apparently cancelled but wasn’t. Excellent! Again, not sure at all what the cancelled trains meant. Yes, that train did go on a different route, BUT I asked the internet if the train going to Waterloo Station in particular was cancelled, it said it was and it wasn’t. I think. So there.

How’s this for an interesting fact: You don’t need a doctorate to be a doctor! How weird does that sound?? Such people are clearly hellbent on annoying me and have been for a LONG time. Well before I was born, even. Fancy claiming something like that. It’s like saying musicians don’t need to know about music to be a musician (ok, ok, you could say that about me technically speaking) or you don’t need to know about art to be an artist. What makes doctors so special? So, doctors clearly don’t care if they stand out from other professions (sounds kinda antisocial, to me), AND they waste people’s times which is even more antisocial. They might as well break into other people’s houses. Here’s something else that’s weird: If I studied music at university for three more years, I could have become a doctor! That means I could give lectures at university! My tip for aspiring musicians? Say ‘boo’ with passion. It’s like playing guitar, you need to put your heart and soul into it, otherwise it noticeably sounds dull to listen to. So practice with me… ‘Booooo! Wahoo!’ What a lecture that would be, no?

Now what should I talk about? Ah yes, whilst sorting through emails for my Metal Rules boss, I spotted an advert for a band and just for something to do, I checked out the song on Youtube, that being ‘Ruby Red’ by Torus. I liked it a lot, but sadly they don’t seem to have any CDs out, so you have to download their files onto your computer/search for them online to listen to them and for me, that’s not good enough. Sorry. So what to do? Let’s promote them here, try to encourage others to do the same and in the end, maybe they’ll be successful enough to release a physical album! Sounds nice of me, doesn’t it? Yes, I Googled myself again and A.I. said some of my Metal Rules are perceived as ‘flattering’. However, A.I. also said I can be blunt as well, so it’s basically calling me ‘two faced’. Also, there is the risk the band wouldn’t want to be promoted by someone like me. If so, super embarrassing. But on the plus side, maybe I could indeed end up buying their album!

Oh yes and talking of adverts, there is a short ad on TV that has a man saying ‘who did I marry??’ with a disgusted look on his face, but you don’t know the whole story. Maybe the wife said something harmless like ‘I’m so sorry, I’m going to be five minutes late because of traffic, xx’. If so, it is a show I’m interested in watching. How does the man react when something serious happens? Sounds a bit dumb, despite my curiosity. I like to think my advert for Torus is better. It will probably cause mixed feelings, but I did mean well. The feelings caused by my comments on the TV advert on the other hand? Mainly negative, I’d imagine. Ok, NOW I’ve run out of things to say, but how to beef this paragraph up, I wonder? Maybe I could discuss what I think my appointment will be like? Well, even though I pretty much know for a fact everything will be completely fine, I still feel a little nervous! Why? I don’t know! Similarly I still get nervous when I get told I need to update my computer even though my new Mac is completely functional! Sounds like PTSD to me. And for now… bye!

It’s now Saturday and I can confirm the checkup was ultra pointless ridiculous. I also arrived there WAY too early. Like REALLY. At least I could visit a charity shop as I waited, right? Nope, there didn’t seem to be any. A rubbish town. Still though, a good five or so minutes had been killed in my search. In the waiting room I THINK I saw an old mental home patient and the other members of staff were acting like she was mental, which I thought was funny. How did people react to me? Relatively normally, so it makes you wonder what was wrong with the other person. As I waited, I needed a wee which was annoying. Nothing to worry too much about until when I was finally called in to my appointment. Why was I looking so agitated? Was there there something to hide? Again, I just needed a wee. Then again, I’m not sure why I’d want to hide something big from a doctor. Why would I hide cancer for example? To be fair though, it was a mental health checkup as well, and you may want to hide delusions of aliens following you around so you don’t make the aliens angry. But as explained, I just needed a wee. And that was checkup neatly summarised, bye!