Staines Ultra Extreme Mega Super Duper Wow Woah Super Extreme Wow Wahey Woo Woo Wow Extreme Unbelievable! (Blog 577)

Yep, I’ve been to Staines again. As I strongly suspected that this would be a short blog, I started the shopping trip by simply walking around an outlet I had no interest in for a few seconds, then leaving, just for the sake of material. What did the place sell? All sorts of things, including plates and luggage bags. Kind of weird, so I do think the following question is valid: What do you call such a shop? Perhaps more importantly, what made the shop so good it replaced another one once selling writing equipment, magazines, etc? I personally prefer the latter kind of shop, unless of course I plan on going on holiday and eating takeaways in a hotel room, which does sound fun. I don’t actually have a luggage bag at the moment! After that, I did the real shopping in the local HMV. Rather rarely, I had a specific CD I wanted to get and not only that, the store had it! Who’s it by? Well, let’s just say the band had an attempted murderer in it and leave it at that. A talented one, though. After that, I got the classic milkshake and muffin in the cafe! Interestingly, the unhealthy meal cost less than the album, suggesting felons can contribute to society and can be valued by other people. He pushed it too far though, didn’t he? It sounds bad doesn’t it? Saying I like attempted murderers more than muffins? I don’t really, but if Allmusic of all sites gave the album 4.5/5 (a bit of a rare score) maybe that suggests things aren’t so bad? Then again, the musician was charged after the review. However, Allmusic haven’t taken the review down, so they can’t be that bothered about the whole situation? It would be easy to sort out, you update the review by giving it one star and you simply delete the old review and write ‘Avoid this music… :S’

Anyway, it doesn’t really matter how much the felon gets paid for his material as he won’t get to spend it, as he’ll be in jail. He can buy shoes, shampoo and crisps maybe, but certainly not a fancy new car, THAT would be madness, easiest escape from jail ever and a humiliating scandal. Annoyingly I was given the wrong muffin, but it didn’t really matter, as it was a very good muffin. Then again, I don’t really think I’ve ever eaten a muffin I haven’t liked, explaining the following joke: What’s wrong with muffins? Nothin’. It can be very hit and miss getting the wrong order when I don’t understand someone’s accent as it’s too thick, and my so called order that I made gets read back to me and I say ‘Yes, that’s what I want’, without understanding what I just said ‘yes’ to. Sometimes I get what I want, sometimes I don’t and other times I get what I didn’t have in mind but end up liking it anyway. After the shopping trip I drove to a local park and had a bit of a ramble. Nice fields, etc. but what was that white fluff all over the place? Feathers? A huge bird attack? There are often free-roaming dogs in the park, maybe that’s what the feathers were? Well probably not as there was no blood anywhere, suggesting the feathers were shed naturally. Do birds go bald?? If so, what else is human about the creatures? Do they go through mid life crises, think about all the things they haven’t done and dream about excellent bird feeders? Who knows?

After that, I got my dad to spray paint some of my car, because I chipped its side on a cardboard sign in the local petrol station a while ago, and my vehicle consequently ended up with a small amount of rust on it. My car has almost been fixed, yet the sign is still damaged. Payback. I’m clearly an irrational person aren’t I? However, I did tell the petrol station staff about the damage and they said it was fine, implying it was their fault. They’re lucky I’m not even more angry at them, I think I should sue. Only joking, that would be way too irrational, that would be absolutely horrible. It would make me feel better though. What am I doing right now? Listening to my new album? Nope, but I certainly will be soon. Right now I’m listening to Bullet For My Valentine’s ’Scream Aim Fire’ album (a fitting title) and it arguably doesn’t sound TOO much like ‘Fever’ or ‘Temper, Temper’, like I was worried about. It’s just Fever sounds like Temper, Temper, that’s all. Scream Aim Fire sounds like it would be angry, just like Temper X2 so you would expect the two releases to be similar, and what has having a fever got to do with anger? You’d expect those albums to be completely different! Unless you got the fever because someone sneezed on you, maybe? If so, write a song about that and remove all mystery. Call it something like ‘Sneeze Rage!’ To wrap things up, you shouldn’t kill people but the guy’s going to jail now, so it’s justice, isn’t it? Much like me damaging the sign! Bye!