Contest 40! (Blog 236)

Yep, I’ve done another comedy contest with only one entrant. I was hoping to get a response from another potential competitor, but I didn’t get one, so here I am. Still, better than doing a no entrant contest again, right? That was a low point for me in terms of apathy and social deviance, but I have pulled through at least a little bit now. Not a lot, but a bit. So what was this event like then? Well winner (and yes loser, technically speaking) Tegan Dawson certainly had a very ‘colourful’ routine you could say, but how do I write about it in a family friendly way, here? Hm. Tough one. But too tough for someone who once bravely blogged about sitting on a chair? Never! So, I guess her set wasn’t ALL bad. She talks of stolen cars, so let’s discuss that. The winner’s husband has a fear of stolen cars (duh), and that anecdote was accompanied with a first rate pirate voice! Excellent comedy. Ok, it doesn’t sound too funny HERE, it sounds more random. (Pirates never had anything to do with cars whatsoever, I can assure you, unless she was impersonating less funny Somalian pirates, but I don’t think so). However, follow the link below and you will be entertained and furthermore, you will think I was being ignorant about pirate voices for comedic effect. (And I was!) But copy and paste at your own risk.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=2655923061294177

Ice in cider seems like a perfectly harmless subject, so let’s… Ah. No. Can’t write about that either, it ends up being about drugs… That went into a more bizarre direction than some of MY stuff. :S I wonder if she needs medication, too. Men sharing their feelings sounds fine and surely isn’t about drugs, so… Ah. Can’t write about that, for a different reason this time. Ok, this blog is even more challenging that I anticipated, but I will keep trying. To coin a phrase, I’m sure it’s not ‘Chair level’. No that definitely won’t catch on. Even I’m not going to say it. Well maybe I will once, to test it out. Let’s watch the routine AGAIN and see what I can come up with. My motto has always been ‘never blog lie’, but will I have to make something clean up, here? Let’s hope not. Ohhh, I know something funny to comment on; Tegan goes ‘Why are jumbo jets painted white? Because they’re plains’. Only joking, she never said that. That’s actually one of my jokes I will be posting in the not so distant future. (So not-distant, it was actually posted yesterday). Might be funny if she did say that though, which is something. Good clean fun, that’s what we want.

Let’s see if I can comment on something else that was actually said in the real world… Nope I think that’s basically it. I think her problem is that she claims she doesn’t know why people get offended so easily. Ahhh. Of course. Maybe if the audience didn’t laugh so much, that would help her out quite a lot and bring her down to earth. Sure it would be painful, but rather a bit of sadness than going to a job interview or whatever and getting arrested. She should try saying she wants to take drugs in front of a mental health professional, and that should give her some insight. HOWEVER, without the insight she’s pretty funny. You just have to weigh up the pro and cons. Be unfunny and continue living in civilised society, or be funny and go to jail. Her choice. (But I recommend the former. Or at least just try and joke about ‘normal’ things. Like I honestly try to).

Three paragraphs, that will do. Never stopped me before. Now to change the subject! Here’s a thought: Why do people say ‘busy as a bee’? Have you ever heard of an insect that isn’t busy? The whole point of the things is to stay as active and alert as possible, or they’re going to run out of food or be eaten. Ok, the phrase ‘busy an insect’ isn’t as catchy, but it IS less confusing. Am I getting a reputation for being pedantic? Is that what’s going on? If so, I just want the world to be a less baffling place. Is that too much to ask? Apparently, yes. Did you know that sloths sleep for 15 hours a day? If it wasn’t for animals like them, my new phrase could be replaced with ‘As busy as an animal’, covering many, many more creatures. That would be awesome. Never mind, byeeeee.