Contest Blog 74! (Blog 404)

Time to share another of Matt’s videos! As he has always agreed to let me share his stuff in the past, I was thinking of writing about one of his vids without his approval, then I’d finally ask Matt when this writing is done. When he’d give me permission, I’d post my blog on this site and share it with him almost immediately. Then he’d be like ‘You wrote that blog in under 2 minutes… Even your typing speed is impressive…’ I didn’t do that however, I got permission a day earlier. What happens in his video this time? He explains how he’s hosting a stand up comedy event. You know who’d love to be part of his show? The Dominant Egg. But of course, he’s an extremely ambitious egg and may try to host the show for himself. So keep your eye out for him Matt. Hang on a second, I’m getting a call… Dominant Egg? What do you want?… You’ve heard Matt is running a comedy event and you want to be part of it?… You have how many egg jokes?… Wow, can I hear one? What’s a comedians favourite part of an egg? I don’t know, what? The egg joke? Ha, that’s not bad… You don’t want to take up any more of my time and you’ll be going? That’s exactly what I wanted to hear from you. Great, bye Egg… Well Matt, what do you think? Are you interested? If so, please email me. Right now to talk about your video again.

As Matt’s video features a number of other people who have their own shows (or bits of shows), how do I score the video on the whole? Hm. Let’s just give all the scores to Matt. Am I sucking up to him or being lazy? Here’s a darker theory: I really want to get on Matt’s side because I’m being controlled by the Dominant Egg (who is dominant, after all) and my end game (or the egg’s end game) is to be best friends with Matt so the egg can appear on his show every day. No. That can’t be what’s happening. It’s too crazy. Moving on, Matt explains that he’s in Hollywood, so if you hear gunshots… that’s what it is! A very deadpan delivery there which makes me wonder if that’s a joke or not. If so, great stuff. If not, either move somewhere else OR buy a machine gun, a bulletproof vest and a bazooka so that you outdo any potential aggressors. A strange site to see, especially for a comedian telling jokes on stage, but I’d watch you and I think others would, too. It really would take heckling to a whole new level. Interestingly another comedian in the vid is wearing camouflage, but he doesn’t appear to be armed. Maybe he has a gun under his clothes? If so, an intense show. Now check out his video below!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZt0PituiSo

Oh wait, I’m getting another call. Dominant Egg again, what do you want this time? You can get me some guns? This is England, they’re not legal, here! You’re on holiday in America? Ohhhh, ok then. Still a bit shady but not illegal. Oh the guns you have are illegal? What do you have then? A bazooka? Look, you have a bright future ahead of you, I don’t know what kind of mental breakdown you’re going through, but this isn’t cool. Bye. Wow. That was a dark conversation, I pray the egg’s doing ok. To lighten the mood, here’s a funny anecdote: A gameshow host said ‘Good luck to both of you’ the two people being contestants. A nice thing to say? Maybe, but the two were competing against each other! How can they BOTH have good luck? A harmless mistake on the part of the host or a statement that can shake up the world of science and logic? I pray it’s the former. If not, the world is too weird for me. It was bad enough with the arms dealing egg, but I can’t deal with a world where two people can win a contest that only allows one winner. I mean what?? Oh never mind, bye!