England Vs USA! (Blog 340)

Yesterday, England played the USA at football! How did it go? Read on! I mean, you’d think England would win as America doesn’t even care about the sport but then again, America has more than 6 times the population to choose footballers from. Therefore to win, England need to care about the game SIX times more than the USA! Not looking so good now, is it? Changing the subject just for a little bit, in an earlier match between Wales and Iran that I turned on at the last minute, a commentator said ‘we’re in the 12th minute of 10 added on if there’s any logic to that’. I mean I HOPE there’s logic to it, otherwise the game would be unfair, wouldn’t it? Amazingly, about one minute later, Iran scored, and another Iranian goal was scored very shortly after that. Bangin’. And Wales were wearing red, the colour of passion. Iran were wearing the peaceful white. :S

Now to talk about Eng vs. USA!… I missed some of the pre-match chat, because I was brushing my teeth after consuming a gingerbread milkshake and a milky bar I was interested in. Might as well get it over with then. It’s just that I had the food in front of me and I couldn’t wait anymore. As I keep saying, it’s an addiction. After the brushing, I wasn’t really paying attention to the chat, because of a weird mixture of tiredness, and excess energy. Earlier on in the day I spent a lot of brainpower reviewing for Metal Rules. In particular, I discussed an Abba cover album but it was a metal cover album! Unsurprisingly I didn’t have a lot good to say about it. Later on, I was buzzing from the sugar so I couldn’t concentrate. But I don’t think the football discussion really mattered, it’s all about the game, right? Oh no, England were shown wearing blue and white?? TWO peaceful colours? Dear God. The lions on the clothes should have energised them, but they were very small. Too small to scare the opponents, I don’t think they would be able to see them.

Just before the kickoff, the Eng footballers were singing ‘God save our KING’! Not queen! I wasn’t used to that, that was very trippy. Argh, who changed England’s clothes to all white? Not sure what happened there… there was still a bit of blue, but… oh never mind.

Ok, now let’s talk about the game as it happened!

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Nothing happens for ages…

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9:12: I thought England scored! Argh!

10:08: The second attempt at scoring didn’t go QUITE so well, but still, exciting stuff.

11:11: Nothing happened despite the nice number (other than a pass). I wonder what 12:34 will bring…

12:21: England would have done better if they didn’t pass to the wrong team.

12:34: Another pass.

13:26: Some person tried to score by doing a funny jump, then falling over.

14:20: Stop chanting ‘USA’, you’re going to lose! -_- And why chant at such a random moment? Nothing happened!

15:42: That was less of an attempt at scoring and more a respectful pass to the goalie.

18:04: An England player did a little skip over the ball. I don’t know why.

19:46: America made a reasonable attempt at scoring? At least chant ‘USA’ then.

22:45: Some guy on the edge of the pitch looks constantly angry. I wonder why.

25:07: America nearly scored, no chants.

25:33: Ok, now there are. A bit late.

27:28: An American made a very half hearted attempt to score an own goal. :S

28:07: More worryingly, America nearly scored against their opponents.

30:29: The commentator finally says ‘half an hour’ gone. More people who are very slow to react.

31:46: An American appeared to piggy back someone for a brief moment. I wonder why.

32:10: Argh! America nearly scored!!!

33:33: What a number. But nothing happened.

40:41: Back off America! You can’t score!

42:11: Back off!

43:11: Now England try to score. How do you like that America? Not a great attempt, but hey.

45:26: England try harder, but not quite good enough!

Here’s a thought in half time: Maybe Harry Kane should call himself ‘Kano’. Like the Mortal Kombat character. THEN people would be scared of him.

47:30: That guy on the edge of the pitch still looks angry.

55:30: I THINK the commentator said ‘you need someone to beat someone’ and I don’t know what that means. Surely he doesn’t mean the team need to beat the other team to win??

56:56: I almost wished America nearly scored simply for the sake of causing excitement. Am I the only one bored? Wake up! That applies to both teams! :S

57:56: Wow the crowed cheered as I was typing something up. Something big’s about to happen…

58:31: Nope.

59:00: Yeah England are chanting! Again, not for any reason, but it’s nice the crowd are feeling positive.

59:55: I was only joking when I said America should wake up! Back off!

62:37: Again, America’s chants are little on the random side.

65 - ish: Wow some very loud cheers. However, I have no idea what happened as I got bored and watched a video on Youtube.

81:05: Did someone run away from the ball? I’m sure there was a good reason.

81:57: I’m just saying, both teams are wearing peaceful colours, and neither have scored. That’s all.

83:43: England have won a foul? What, like a dog turd? What kind of competition is this?

85:13: I’m still thinking about that gingerbread milkshake, it was really nice. It’s a shame I’m sure they will be discontinued after Christmas.

86:43: England try to score again, but don’t. Maybe my time would be better spent on Youtube.

90:15: Wow, four added minutes. I bet nothing will happen.

92:28: If England have less than two minutes to go, stop standing still for ages. I don’t care if it is a corner.

92:51: Argh! Eng nearly scored!

Awesome a draw. Maybe my time watching the match could have been better spent at the gym, and because of chaos theory, MAYBE I prevented either England or America from winning by staying at home. Somehow. Who knows, right? Ok, now I’ll watch Youtube. MAYBE me watching Youtube earlier caused a draw???? If so, I apologise. Bye!