Exercise Bike! (Blog 223)

Ok! I got my exercise bike, yesterday. Holy moly, is it brutal! Apparently at the gym I was burning 700 calories in about an hour (well an hour and ten minutes, as I consistently got away with working out ten minutes longer than I was allowed to), with my new equipment I’m burning 150 calories an hour, but I’m putting the same effort into it! Ouch. That hurt my self-esteem. I like to believe the gym was right as the equipment there is more expensive. See the logic?? On a more positive note, I ran 12 minutes yesterday with little knee pain. My knees are getting better! (Slowly). I’ve been adding a minute every 7 days, meaning I should be able to run a whole marathon in maybe four years. But I can’t be bothered. Actually that sounds like torture. Torture that’s good for you, though. Needless to say, most torture is super bad for you. (Other than Chinese water torture, which just makes your forehead wetter, bit by bit. I mean the victims SAID it was agony, if you see where I’m going. In reality it was probably just boring).

Yes, it’s a shame I’m not riding my bike in the fresh-(ish) open air (I don’t live in the French countryside - THAT had nice air), but as explained the noise of the wind and traffic seems to have damaged my hearing in the past. Whilst my ears are a lot better than they were, they’re still recovering, so I’m not biking outside any time soon. If you think my complaints are strange, check this out :O…. I can hear some guitar parts of Black Sabbath’s ‘After Forever’ and not others. It wouldn’t be so weird, but the parts are identical, they just get repeated! Interestingly the exact same parts in Stryper’s cover of the song have the same effect on me. I think my ears have gone mad. It makes obsoletely no sense.

Anyway, the bike. I really was sweating like a pig on it. That’s how you know it’s good. After an hour of pain, you get at least 2 hours (if not 3) of a great mood, and I think that’s a good deal. The position of it is pretty good, too; it’s placed in the ‘music room’ of the house, no one really ever goes to, because it’s basically just a normal room with another TV, an electronic drum kit (which I rarely play), a guitar (which I play every now and then) and some seats and stuff. That means I get to exercise in peace AND watch TV at the same time. I suppose technically I can play my guitar at the same time too, but I can’t imagine me getting much joy out of doing so - too intense. And it would make me look like a twat, if I got caught. For whatever reason, my dad wanted the machine to be in another room with nothing but clothes in it, but I can’t really understand his logic. I think he was just trying to annoy me. But I got my way in the end.

I’ve just today finished my last serious music review of the month for theindependentvoice.org, meaning I can get back to my comedy site, soon! (Well I have done just now, duh. Actually, I suppose you could consider this blog more of a strange medical journal rather than a comedy, to be fair). I explained to my boss I would like to just do 5 critiques a month, but last time she gave me 6 and an explanation, this time I got 6 with no explanation. I hope that doesn’t become a habit. It will be awkward me requesting to do less, but if things keep going on the way there are now, technically I could do hundreds of albums a month in the upcoming years, maybe with an insult. In the worst case scenario, my life would be nothing more than marathons and music, which would drive me insane. But that seems unlikely, unless someone forces me to run them. In that case, my life would be extremely weird. I mean, why??? I don't think that's happened before. That’s it. Bye!