Mini Steam Roller Get Together (Blog 380)

For reasons I don’t FULLY understand, my dad ordered a mini steam roller with a seat that’s just large enough to sit on. Maybe he was inspired by the mini trains place? If not, you have to wonder what’s going on inside his head. By that I mean I’m sure the thing would provide at least some enjoyment, but what kind of OAP rides a mini steam roller all day long? Because he’d have to ride it all day long to justify spending so much on it. I think it’s unfair that if I acted in the same way, I’d go to a mental home again. My dad turned part of the garden into a muddy steam roller track which was intended to be enjoyed by my brother’s family of mini people arriving later on. First, I don’t think anyone cares enough to justify the actions, secondly and most importantly, he’s ruined the lawn! Even worse, he seemed to have got bored very early on and the track wasn’t so much a lap, more of an incomplete, mud line that goes on for about 2 metres. There is another small patch of mud a foot next to it. I’m not exaggerating. God knows what he was thinking when he dumped a load of branches in the middle of the unfinished route. Maybe they signalled where not to go, which to be fair does make sense. I wouldn’t have a clue where not to go.

Maybe he was thinking children are very easy to impress. But come on, going less than 1 mph down a very short strip of mud just isn’t the same as going maybe 10 mph on a small train across at least a mile of country scenery. ‘Wow, your garden must be huge if there’s a whole if unfinished steam roller track…’ That’s thing, it’s not. Now the garden can only be described as like it’s been attacked by lazy vandals. Nothing to boast about if he ever plans to sell the property. Who knows, maybe he never will, instead he’ll go on an even more random spending spree. Why not buy a rally car for the garden? That would be good. Oh no, now my dad is hammering bits of coal. Why in God’s name is he doing that? Oh thank God! It’s for the steam engine, isn’t it? Phew! What can’t be explained however, is the seven tennis balls he’s placed or at very least left by accident in the garden. If it was an accident, there’s still time to pick them up. Please do, in fact, it looks weird. Unless of course he’s going for a real life Micro Machines feel? Remember that old racing game? That’s basically what the garden looks look. Lots of random stuff everywhere, basically.

Ok, now my dad’s moved the steam roller near to the tennis balls, and walked away from it. I’m looking at him through my bedroom window. Now I’d love to know what’s going on in his mind more than ever… And now my dog’s staring at the thing. In my opinion, it’s just as confused as me. (A few minutes pass). Ok, now there are just six tennis balls on the grass. Does that mean anything to you? It sure doesn’t mean anything to me. Maybe one of them is hidden by the steam roller. I’m going to get to the bottom of this, I’m going to the garden now, to see what’s happened to the other ball… Yep, it’s gone. Hopefully the dogs took it. If my dad did so… well. No hope. Let’s check how many tennis balls are on the garden now. It’s been a good few minutes… Still six!! Awesome. (A few minutes pass again). Ok, there are still six tennis balls. But why has my dad put the dog on the train and taken a load of pictures with his mobile phone? Hm.

(An hour or so passes and family visit).

Ahhh, of course. The tennis balls were for throwing to the dog. My niece worked that out for herself, so she seems to be a more logical person than me, but you can understand why I was confused. One ball would have sufficed, but seven or later six (maybe my dad kept one for himself for his own private use) work just as well, I guess. My dad explained to everyone you need a licence to drive the steam roller down the street, but I doubt he’s ever going to get that licence, as he crashed it twice. After that, my dad explained how he wouldn’t be giving everyone a ride as the ground was too rough. I guess a partially ruined lawn wasn’t enough, he needs to ruin all of it. Will he ever go that far in the future? I honestly have absolutely no idea whatsoever. My birthday plans were discussed and we all MIGHT be going to local fair as well as a restaurant later on next week. I assumed I’d only be doing the latter. My original plan was to go shopping in Kingston early on in my birthday, but I guess I could go the day after. I will be 35 after all. It’s a nice round number that deserves to be celebrated. After about an hour of all that stuff, my brother’s family went home. And that was it! So, bye!