Not again!!!!! (Blog 305)

A new dentist blog! How am I going to make this one interesting? Tough one. I hate to sound repetitive, but as I left the house with so much time to get to the teeth sadists, I drove with extra confidence. At first the direction I drove in was completely bizarre, but luckily my Satnav corrected me. All I had to do was a 180 degrees turn on a roundabout, and go in a more logical direction. Whilst the latter was certainly an improvement and it did make sense, the way I was going was still new for me. Apparently it was 2 minutes longer. Not a big deal, right? (I know you know what’s coming). Sadly as I was approaching the evil teeth torturers from a new direction, I couldn’t for the life of me work out where to park. In what I hoped was an intelligent move, I told my Satnav to take me home. I did indeed drive in the direction of my house for a couple of minutes, I found a place to stop, then I told my driving aid to take me to the dental scrapers another time. Sadly it told me to go in the same confusing direction as earlier, but I took a chance and parked in a place I was unfamiliar with. Success! I parked in SUCH an intelligent place. How smart am I?? (Actually I only live about 3 miles from the dentist, so maybe not that much). The irony is, the place I stopped required less walking than usual. Is that irony? I think it’s a mild kind at least. Whatever the case, pretty neat.

I made a physical note of the street I left my car and the name of the charity shop that was nearby. Would you believe that as I walked to the teeth brutalisers, a strong wind pushed me in the right direction? An optimistic person could say that was a sign from God, but of course, why did I have to be so puzzled earlier? Maybe to make me grow? To be fair, I think I did. When in the building, a patient patient (not a typo, he was patient and a patient) asked me if I was nervous. I said ‘a little bit, yeah!’ He then told me it wouldn’t be painful, though I had to correct him. Eventually, I got called in to the torture room and was operated on. Just like last time, I was thinking to myself ‘Hm. Not too bad’. Then of course, things escalated. Ouch. When everything was over, I was shown my teeth. I was like ‘Pretty good!’ or whatever. You may remember I complained to the dentists last time, saying they didn’t clean my teeth properly. To prepare for similar comments today, it’s very possible the nurses showed me my teeth in the right lighting so as to make me think everything was fine. When I checked my teeth in my car mirror I thought to myself ‘they tricked me’. They did clean my teeth a bit, but they didn’t make everything ok. Very sad.

Anyway, the dentist. When I was told to leave, I was also told to book another appointment in 6 months’ time. Very straightforward, even for someone like me. After doing so, I told the receptionist that I had a meeting with a different scheming tooth trickster in a few minutes for a checkup. (But not in those words, don’t worry). I was told the dentist was sick so he couldn’t cause me intense pain, that time. I asked why I needed a checkup when I had just seen another dentist. I mean she’s not blind, right? (Right???) Surely she must know if my teeth are ok. Apparently not for sure. But still I thought ‘screw it, I’m probably fine’ and walked back towards my car. No, wait! What about the charity shop?? Well, in one final bit of drama, I wanted two CDs, but was told I needed pay with cash, not a credit card. As I was so confident with my note I literally walked to my vehicle as if it was nothing, picked up some change, and went to the shop again! Then I went home. Massive success. Even if my teeth are still a bit manky. Bye!